Travel Lacks Common Sense

A travel article appeared in today's UK Telegraph, talking about the strangest complaints made to Thomas Cook (a large UK tour company) or the Association of British Travel Agents.

I'm not sure this list should be accepted as strictly British; yet, far be it from me to cast aspersions on tourists of other not-as-well-traveled countries. Feel free to ask when next we speak if I knew of possibilities that could have been posted here. Regardless, many of these nits are both strange and wonderful. These are some of my favourites:

• A tourist at a top African game lodge overlooking a waterhole, who spotted a visibly aroused elephant, complained that the sight of this rampant beast ruined his honeymoon by making him feel "inadequate"
• No-one told us there would be fish in the sea. The children were startled
• It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England it only took the Americans three hours to get home
• My fiancé and I booked a twin-bedded room but we were placed in a double-bedded room. We now hold you responsible for the fact that I find myself pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked
• I compared the size of our one-bedroom apartment to our friends' three-bedroom apartment and ours was significantly smaller
• There are too many Spanish people. The receptionist speaks Spanish. The food is Spanish. Too many foreigners
• On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don't like spicy food at all
• We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our swimming costumes and towels

Sorry. The jokes at this point are just too easy.